The Jean Machine

My mother was such a cute kid. My Aunt Joy will send me random pictuers of her as they clean out my grandfathers house. I love seeing these. My heaer sweels when I see pictures of her. Let alone pictures I have never seen .

Memorial Day 2015

This memorial day the kids went to the cemetery to have a visit my my mother. It was a beautiful day. The cemetery was beautiful. Filled with flowers from loved ones. American flags lining the driveways. So many loved ones left flowers at my mothers grave. I love seeing it decorated  and those whom are still here have not forgotten her. 

Words cannot describe how much I miss my mother. 

Gravesite Visit

Memories

Since my grandfather has passed away and we are cleaning out the house,we have run across a lot of pictures. These in particular are precious to me. I had never seen these before. The ones of my mom in a white dress are when she is pregnant with me.

I miss her more than I could even describe.

Flowers for mom

 

 

 

This year for mothers day went an visited my moms graveside and left her a small rose bush. Roses are beautiful, and are very little maintenance. We were sure that the rain and sprinkler system would keep it watered and growing. Seems we were wrong. Just 4 days later, we went to visit the grave site for her birthday and found the rose bush dry, brown and dead. Oddly, I was a bit heart broken that it did not survive. So, we took the bush home to save it. We left it in its container and placed in near the tomato plates where it would get plenty of water and sunshine.

Last night while playing with the kids outside I was just about to throw it out when I noticed the tiniest amount of new growth beneath and the dead leaves and flowers. I went and stripped it of the deadness to reveal a lot more new growth. This made my heart beam with happiness. My hope is for the small rose bush to grow, and to be a beautiful addition to our yard.

 

 

{Love}

Yesterday , I started the process of going through some of my mothers things. When, I ran across this. Words can not express how much I miss her.

My heart aches everyday. She is so beauitful. Inside and out.

Memorial Flowers

 

Sunday afternoon we took flowers over to my mothers grave for Memorial Day. The cemetery looked amazing with the flags flying and all of the flowers. The weather was fantastic. And, it was nice to finally be able to sit on the lawn and visit with each other to reminis and speak about my mom.

I really need to make a larger effort in making out to visit her. But, I am still mourning after 1.5 years and still struggling. It is always hard for me to visit.

 

 

62nd

Today would have been my moms 62nd birthday. Oh how I miss her. We all miss her so much

 

Yesterday we had a family BBQ at her house to celebrate. Afterwards we went over to  the grave-site to visit. While sitting and eating dinner there was a break in converstaion when Charlotte says " you know, Grandma is sitting right there" motioning to the only empty chair at the table.

I sure hope that was true.  

 

This afternoon Charlotte and I placed some flowers next to an angel in the yard .

Cancer Walk 2014

This was our first cancer walk as a family since my mothers passing. It was an emotional walk, but it was different. I cant really pinpoint it, but it just was different. I had some amazing friends join me. For some, it was there first time attending.

 

 After the walk we always go to lunch as a family. Poor corbin.

Pictures

My mother has been asking for me to post some new picture of Charlotte since she has not been able to make it over. Charlotte is so expressiv. She has a thousand faces adn we just love everyone of them.

Me looking lovely.


Charlotte snuggling with Aunt Shannon

3rd times a charm

On Tuesday my mother had her petscan. She hates going to get this scans. She is always nervous about the outcome. Well the outcome of the this scan was not the best. It turns out that the treatments she has been doing for the last 6 months have not been working and the tumors have grown on size. This treatment was supposed to shrink the tumors. Also, it looks like she has a new one near her liver. She will be stopping her current treatment, and will be starting Chemotherapy again Friday, February 20th. Leading up to her chemotherapy start date, she will be getting blood work done, have her PortCath put back in and preparing herself for the tiring treatments, and possible hair loss. This is her 3rs time going under treatment for this, so lets hope that it is true about the 3rd time being the charm. On top of all this, her life long friend of over 20yrs just found out that she has Lung Cancer. Joanie Girl(as we call her) has never smoked a day in her life. She was on vacation when she started not feeling well. She came home early, went to the doctors, and this is the news she found out.
I promise to keep you all updated on the progress of my moms treatment, and let you know how she is doing.





As most of you know, every year we participate in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. This is something we love participating in. If you would like to participate this year it is May 9th @ The Gateway 8am. When we get our team page set up I will send out the link.